On December 31st, like many other hopeful fools, I wrote a love letter with wishes and dreams to usher in the new decade. Similar to my foolish comrades, I made many plans for '20. This was going to be the year that I created "space" in all aspects of my life; beckoning new beauties to … Continue reading Dear 2020, This is NOT What I Meant When I Told You I Wanted “Space” this Year 😒.
As I embrace 2020, I take time to also thank and acknowledge 2019 for my growth.
December 2018, I had three conversations with intelligent, wise, and loving women that fundamentally changed the way I view relationships. On a holiday trek through D.C., New Jersey, and Jamaica, I put these lessons into practice and was astounded at the results. My journey to manifesting more mutual, spiritual, and meaningful friendships, mentorship, and romantic … Continue reading How to Have More Meaningful and Loving ::RELATIONSHIPS::
I can proudly say that exercising empathy is one of my greatest strengths. I can be open-hearted and loving to a fault of my own. Countless times I've found myself devastated at how the love I poured into others wasn't returned back to me. TD Jakes refers to this archetype as "big hearted people" and … Continue reading How to Have More Meaningful and Loving ::FRIENDSHIPS::
DISCLAIMER: It has come to my attention that some folk believe that I "have it all together." Please accept this disclaimer as my way of saying three things: 1) I am figuring this out (and making this up) right alongside you dear reader; 2) I am not immune to feeling completely lost in tasks that … Continue reading Overcoming Periods of Self Doubt…or How to Win a Fool’s Game
In Nigerian culture,** parents typically assemble grandparents, close friends, a pastor, and relatives for a naming ceremony for the child, 7 days after birth. It is an occasion full of celebration, prayer, and inspiration as everyone revels over what the child's name will be. Typically, the child will have several traditional names, an English (or name … Continue reading How a Dream Becomes a Vision
Allow me to provide you with some more spiritually-guided unsolicited advice. If you've interacted with me recently, at some point you may have heard me talking about how I "stay ready, so I never have to get ready." I want to break down what this means to me and why it's been so important in … Continue reading STAY Ready. Don’t GET Ready.
This topic is close to my heart, because as a Ph.D. Candidate these are the crossroads that I currently find myself at. I've done a little research to save you the time, dear reader, and help you on your journey. However, lest I remind you that I am but a lowly Ph.D. Candidate, my unsolicited … Continue reading Claiming Your Expertise: How to Choose a Dissertation Topic
It's so dastardly simple that it's also a bit hard to accept as an answer. But so much of what we need to do in life can be boiled down to just showing up. Bringing all of your attention, heart, and body into the space where you're working. Relationships, presentations, acts of service would all … Continue reading Want to Change the World? Just Show Up.
This is the age-old question that I ask myself and constantly gets asked of me. I would like to believe that it was my strategic foresight, research and leadership experiences, and all of my ambition. And while that may be part of the story--a large part--it it still far from complete. When I originally wrote … Continue reading How I Got Into Stanford…I Think
The weeks leading up to the 2015 NSF GRFP deadline were consumed by editing personal statements with a writing tutor, drafting research proposals with my advisors, and tracking down recommendation writers for the application. If this story resonates with you--if you even know what "NSF GRFP" stands for, then I'm sure you were in a … Continue reading D42: Why Fellowship Applications Should Be a 3-Credit Course
I don't know about you, but I have struggled to answer the "how are you holding up?" question. So much so, I now answer with a blanket "I don't know," which is neither helpful nor informative. To overcome this, I've dreamed up a list of questions that have sparked far more interesting check-in conversations for … Continue reading “Hey Champ…” And Other (Arguably Better) Ways to Check-in During the COVID-19-era
If there's a young child in your life, I want you to try this experiment or do an observation (in a non-creepy way) of a healthy parent-child interaction. EXPERIMENT: Watch the child do or say something that makes others laugh, smile, or offer a lot of positive reinforcement and celebration. Make note on whether or … Continue reading Be Excellent. Celebrate. Repeat.
Okay, I know the title comes off a bit harsh. I mean, who do I think I am telling other grad students what they struggle with? Well, kudos to you for being intrigued enough to continue on anyway. To attend to my earlier question: I am an incoming fourth year Ph.D. candidate in ME that has … Continue reading Five Things Incoming Grad Students Get Wrong–A LOT